Today bloggers all over the world are posting amusing and uplifting stories about cancer. The stories will be compiled in an anthology to benefit Melissa Bradley. I hope we can help alleviate some of the huge expense associated with her cancer treatment. Please visit the other blogs involved in this project to read their stories.
It was harder than I anticipated to find a funny or uplifting story from my own cancer experience. I don’t have any trouble writing funny scenes about my characters’ cancer journeys, but it’s hard to remember anything pleasant about my own cancer experience. Anyway, after several days of thinking about it, I remembered this incident –
Nothing pushes aside social niceties quite as effectively as cancer.
It’s hard to care about manners or appearances when you feel like death warmed over. Three treatments into my six months of chemotherapy, my husband signed me up for a “Look Good, Feel Better” seminar. Intellectually, I understood that he was trying to be helpful and was searching for anything he could do to make me feel better. Emotionally, I took it as a denigrating comment on my appearance at the time. I was mostly bald, my skin was ashen, and I appeared to have aged twenty years overnight. I didn’t look good and didn’t think makeup was going to make me feel better. Needless to say, I walked into the tiny conference room where the class was held with a bad attitude.
Most of the people there were older women in uncomfortable looking wigs and sour expressions. I sat in the corner beside a teenager napping in a wheelchair. She looked Violet in Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory just after she ate the forbidden piece of gum, except she was grey instead of purple. Her sweatshirt was grey, her skin was grey, and her body was incredibly swollen. I doubt she could have walked on those puffy feet if she tried to stand up.
As the class began, I had trouble concentrating on the instructions for tying a piece of soft flannel around my skull like a turban or how to use cosmetics to give the illusion of eye lashes. I felt too tired to care about the finer points of blush application. At the end of the class, we were each given a bag of cosmetics to take home. The instructor suggested we play with the makeup there so she could answer any questions we had. I opened up a stunningly beautiful gold Estee Lauder compact and smoothed some powder across my cheeks. It did make me look better.
Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed the teenaged girl dumping her bag out on the table. She picked up a tiny mirror in her sausage-like fingers and drew two heavy slanted lines on her forehead with an eye pencil. “Look,” she said, turning to me. “Angry eyes.”
An older lady decked out in a pink sparkly sweatshirt scoffed from across the table. “What are you doing? That is Lancome eyeliner.”
The absurdity of her being appalled at the obviously ill teenager wasting eyeliner pulled me out of my fog. I pulled the stick of eyeliner from my bag and drew two arches high on my forehead. “Surprise!” I said.
The teenager laughed at me. Her smile transformed her face from a grey moon to a beam of sunshine. The room, except for the one older woman that had berated her, erupted in laughter. The other women all found their eyeliners and drew exaggerated eyebrows on their foreheads. We looked ridiculous. We were wasting the cosmetics. We were having fun.
By the time our caregivers came back to collect us, the women were all chatting and sharing stories while we played with the make-up. Even the grouchy woman in the sparkly sweatshirt seemed to enjoy trying out a new lipstick color. We looked good and definitely felt better after attending that class.
Twelve years later, I still think about that teenager with the puffy face every time I see that gold compact at the back of my make-up drawer. I don’t use it, but I can’t seem to get rid of it.
If you have a story about cancer and friendship, I am collecting them at The Waiting Room Project. Consider adding your voice to the mix.
Noelle Granger said:
Great story, Elizabeth. Touching and inspiring and sad, too. I met a woman who taught those classes and she was very dedicated to the members of her classes. Would be interesting to have a perspective from the other side. Yours is amazing.
Elizabeth Hein said:
The classes are a great idea. The woman that taught mine was doing her best. I was just in no mood to care about wigs and make up at the time.
Chrys Fey said:
I love this, Elizabeth! I smiled when I read that you drew “surprise” eyebrows on your forehead. And I like that you still have that gold compact to remember the young girl and the laughter you shared.
Elizabeth Hein said:
Thanks, Chrys. I’ve thought about that young woman many times over the years. I hope she recovered.
jasonfeingold said:
That was a very touching story. I hope I’ll be able to find something to laugh at when my number comes up.
Nicki Elson said:
Haha! Picturing that room full of silly expressions is cracking me up. It’s so wonderful that you decided to play & inspired the rest of the room to join you.
Michael Di Gesu (@DAK86) said:
Hi, Elizabeth…
Thanks for the laughs…. It’s stories like yours that are needed when anyone has to confront the BIG C… I am THRILLED that you fought back an won your battle. Keeping positive even when we feel like CRAP is part of our human make up. We are ALL CAPABLE as long as we keep FIGHTING!
Elizabeth Hein said:
You are so right, Michael. It was a tough fight but I got through with the help of my family and friends.
Jemi Fraser said:
That’s a great story! Love the eyebrows – and you made life a little easier for that teen! Good for you 🙂
Elizabeth Hein said:
Thanks, Jemi. I have wondered many times if that young woman is still alive. I have no way of knowing.
Nick Wilford said:
That really lightened the mood in the room. Sometimes sharing a laugh like that can give us a real lift. Great story!
Tyrean Martinson said:
Wow! Beautiful and touching story. I love how laughter and the ridiculous moments can make us feel so much brighter and better. 🙂 Thanks for sharing!
Denise Covey (@DeniseCCovey) said:
This was certainly uplifting Elizabeth. What a lovely story!!
Melissa Bradley said:
I love this!! I would so be drawing outrageous eyebrows. Thank you very, very much for sharing and participating. You rock!!
Elizabeth Hein said:
Melissa, if my little story made you smile, then my job is done. You are in my thoughts these days.
E.J. Wesley said:
Nothing will put what is important to you in its proper place like having your health stripped away. A great reminder for day-to-day living. 🙂
Elizabeth Seckman said:
I think that is an awesome story. I would keep that compact too. It’s a great reminder of living in the moment.
Elizabeth Seckman said:
P.S. So glad your story is one of survival! I love it when cancer gets a kick in the ass. It’s a win for every victim.
Michelle Wallace said:
What a heart-warming story! Very inspiring.
I’m so glad you gave cancer A BIG KICK IN THE PANTS (…and thank you to the gold compact too…)
Rock on, Elizabeth!
Hilary said:
Hi Elizabeth – great you beat cancer … but your story – I can imagine you feeling terrible and definitely not wanting to be in the room .. then the way the mind let’s us draw surprise eyebrows out of the blue .. and everyone laughs .. that’s what it is about …
Don’t chuck out the gold compact … it’s a talisman … I hope the kid was able to have a happier life … with thoughts – Hilary