To celebrate her third blogiversary, Carrie Butler is hosting a blogfest about how authors have found their path. Over sixty authors are writing notes to themselves when they were first starting out on their journey. Please visit the list on Carrie’s blog to see what people came up with. I am excited to contribute my voice to the chorus.
Here is my note to myself:
Listen To all voices. Follow your own.
It may feel like you are blindly wandering down your writing path, but you have a good sense of direction. Trust yourself and learn what you need to know along the way. Don’t mistake inexperience for ignorance. Read every book on the craft of writing you can find. Take notes and revisit your favorite guidebooks often. Put yourself out there and join critique groups. They won’t all work out, but some will. Look for words of wisdom wherever you can. Listen to every voice you can hear, but don’t ignore the voice inside your own head.
You will encounter many conflicting voices along your path to publication. Most of them fall into one of three groups – friends and family, critique partners, and teachers. Your friends and family love you. They may not love what you write. You can’t let the fear of upsetting people hobble you. If you’re worried that Aunt Matilda will recognize herself in one of your characters, you won’t be able to write as authentically as you should. Some family members will not be supportive. They will worry that your book about a cheating husband that gives his wife an STD will be misconstrued as being autobiographical and reflecting poorly on them. Write the book anyway. They will be much more enthusiastic about your next book that has to do with child abuse, cancer, and friendship. You can’t hold back. Write what you feel compelled to write. Aunt Matilda doesn’t need your approval before deciding which houses she will list as a real estate broker. You do not need her approval when you are planning your plots. Listen to your love one’s opinions, then close your office door, and write your book.
The path from concept to finished book can be a long, lonely journey. You will need to commiserate with other writers about the frustrations and joys of the writing process. A critique group can keep you going when you are stuck in the murky middle of a project. That being said, choose your friends wisely. Don’t share your early drafts with just anyone. Look for critique partners that are in similar places in their writing careers, write similar types of books, and can give non-judgmental critiques. Don’t be afraid to walk away from a group that isn’t serious about improving their writing or isn’t supportive of you as a writer. Don’t let anyone tell you how your book “should” be, especially before it is fully realized. Look for those few people that can nurture you with constructive criticism and have the wisdom to help you hone your own voice.
You will make many mistakes along your writing path, and you will make many more. One mistake to be careful of is allowing your insecurity to allow you to take bad advice solely because you are paying for the advice. Don’t go on that intensive three-day workshop where four authors send in the first fifty pages of a work-in-progress and the instructor rips your manuscripts apart. It will be brutal and set you back for over a year. Don’t believe the teacher when she tells you that if you want to write women’s fiction, a romance needs to be the central part of the plot, the main character has to be young, and you can’t have the main character get diagnosed with cancer. You know better. Look at your bookshelves and see all the books that do not conform to those strictures. Not all advice is good advice. Take the nuggets of truth in her advice and leave the other stuff behind. Do keep all of your class notes though. Sometimes it’s hard to absorb all the information coming at you. After you’re finished licking your wounds from that weekend, take the intention behind the instructors words to heart and make sure you temper the darker parts of your work with humor. Go ahead and write about difficult subjects but make sure there is a light to balance out the darkness. A dark chocolate torte is enhanced by a little whipped cream and strawberries on the side. Seek out as many good teachers as you can. Listen to what they have to say, then make your own decisions. Study your genre like you would any other topic. Instead of writing what someone else thinks you should write, write a good book and then figure out where it fits in within a larger genre.
You will always be a student of writing. Look for wisdom wherever you can find it. Everyone has something to offer. Learn to listen to all the voices through the filter of your own vision.
Elizabeth Hein
Author of How To Climb The Eiffel Tower (10/14)
ElizabethHein.com
permission granted to use my entry in ebook compilation
Scribbling In The Storage Room 
I love your advice! It’s great to hear about others paths along the journey of writing. Thanks for sharing!
Love your sage advice, Elizabeth. Many gems in there.
I absolutely love your blog’s makeover. It’s almost as if you’ve transported it through a time machine (like in “Back to the Future”); now, it’s a full-featured, whiz-bang blog. 🙂
Thanks, Sue. I’m glad you like the new design. I had fun designing the header.
Fabulous and smart! Header and ‘ads.’ Nice job. 🙂
Thanks Elizabeth. Your advice is both Inspiring and practical. ‘Look for those few people that can nurture you with constructive criticism and have the wisdom to help you hone your own voice.’ So true! and so hard to find! I know a lot of people who read, but I don’t know any writers personally (although I know some wonderful writers who are my virtual friends!), and it’s often a ‘lonely’ task. I’ve learnt that aspiring/indie/self-published/ and probably all writers need each other for support, encouragement, and advice. I’ve just joined the Blogfest, too. Thanks for sharing! Looking forward to your next post…
It is nice to have local writer friends to meet for coffee and support. For instance, I spent this morning sitting outside a cafe selling books with two of my critique buddies. I love my virtual friends, but it is great to spend time with my local friends.
On the other hand, it’s hard to make polite conversation over coffee after someone just told you they hate your book. You can delete mean comments from your email much easier.
I suppose you can’t please everyone 😦 but you’re so lucky to be in touch physically with other authors. I miss that. But I’m working on getting something going in the south of Spain, where I live. There are plenty of English speakers living here. I just have to find a few who also write!
Fantastic advice about not holding back for fear you may upset someone. That is a difficult obstacle for many writers, I believe.
Your last paragraph is gold. I especially love “Learn to listen to all the voices through the filter of your own vision.”
Thanks, Sarah. It was difficult to get over my fear of upsetting my family. It can still be awkward at times. I have learned to not talk about my work with certain people.
Well-done, Elizabeth. “Trust yourself” is the most empowering advice, and it reminds us that WE are responsible for making good decisions no matter what others tell us.
Did you change themes? I like the new look and the background color is soothing, yet still easy to read (so many blogs use color combos that obscure the type for my aging eyes).
Love this. No one can tell you what really works but you. It’s so easy to listen to the voices around you rather than putting your foot down, but when it comes down to it, you have to write what is in your heart. Great thoughts.
I paused at the part about the worry over the STD affair story being construed as autobiographical . . . so funny. I agree with you whole-heartedly. We need to listen and study, and learn. Then, we need to trust our own story. Wonderful letter!
Thanks, Tyrean. It was awkward for awhile. How do you really assure someone that their child is not a philanderer without actually talking about it?
Great advice, Elizabeth, especially since I can see it from an inside track.
Great letter, I see a lot of wisdom here. It’s definitely true that we need to soak up all the wisdom we can, but it’s OK to reject it if it doesn’t work for us. If you don’t stay true to yourself you will go off course.
I love the concept of listening to all the advice and all the voices but in the end following your own. It’s so true and very worthwhile advice.
It can be hard to do too – especially not listening to bad advice. It’s hard for budding writers to have that confidence and follow their own gut, isn’t it. It sounds like that weekend was pretty horrific and yet I love that from all the negativity you managed to pull out of a it a positive learning lesson.
Great post!!
Beautiful stuff here. Elizabeth. I especially love the title – so well said!
“Don’t mistake inexperience for ignorance.”
Powerful line, and one so many new writers need to hear.
Great entry!
I do believe you covered everything. Great advice!
Thanks for visiting my blog.
Hugs and chocolate!
Shelly
“Listen to what they have to say, then make your own decisions.” — Yes! It’s easy to get caught up pleasing other people, but in the end, it’s your story, your writing, and your name on it. Great post!
Good advice, Elizabeth…
One must listen to their own inner voice. Not every subject matter will be pleasing to everyone.
My second novel is about a teen boy who is horribly abused by his military, alcoholic father. Needless to say there are some major red flags here. But I wrote what I needed to write. And the reviews so far are in my favor. So I will keep moving on with it. Currently looking for an agent now.
Thanks for dropping by my blog earlier. It’s nice to meet you. And congrats on your new book coming out this fall!
“Aunt Matilda doesn’t need your approval before deciding which houses she will list as a real estate broker. You do not need her approval when you are planning your plots.”
Yes! High five for that. 🙂 Thank you so much for participating, Elizabeth!
I relate to family members thinking your work will reflect badly on them – I remember my mum asking “which character is me?” when she read one of my short stories. The answer was: none.
Loved this! Continuing to learn from other authors is one of the great privileges of being a writer – one I hope never goes away, and you’ve captured that spirit here perfectly while reminding us to stay true to ourselves.
Thanks, Nicole. I want to keep learning a little bit more every day.
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